Chocolate or Poop? Chocolate or Poop?!

Chocolate or poop? Chocolate or poop?

One of my favorite lines to recite from the movie Baby Mama


Never did I think I’d be asking the question to myself… although, I have scolded, “We don’t poop on the rock!” So really, nothing should surprise me at this point…

I am still getting used to this having two babies thing. Technically, at 22 months my daughter is a toddler, but she is still in diapers, and still wears footie jammies. So the way I see it, she’s a baby. I have a baby and a newborn. A newborn son and a climbing, running, “I do it myself” demanding baby-ish daughter.

Over the past four weeks, we have spent the majority of our day confined to the living room as my butt seems to be permanently glued to the couch nursing a hungry (slightly fussy) newborn. My daughter occupies her time playing LEGOs, emptying my Tupperware drawer and her sock drawer, climbing the kitchen counters, and eating granola bars. This day, she happened to be engaged with an episode of her other obsession, Paw Patrol, on the iPad which was conveniently sitting next to me. I myself was guiltily enjoying my DVR’d episode of The Bachelor. One baby nursing, the other finishing up her chocolate cookie.

Wait, she didn’t have a cookie. Maybe she had a granola bar?

What is it she is trying to wipe off of her hands…

… and onto the iPad

… and onto the couch

… and onto my leg?

No. Nope. No. She didn’t have any chocolate!

Chocolate or Poop? Chocolate or Poop?!

As I watch my daughter reach her hand back into the butt of her pants it finally hit me, POOP! That is most definitely not chocolate, it is poop.

Now you may think this is the worst of it. A daughter covered in poop. Poop residue lingering on my iPad, couch, pants and carpet. My friend, that is not the worst part. The worst part is I have ONE hand to try and grab her. To try and make her stop reaching into her pants to bring out more poop. One hand to try and stop her from spreading poop any place she comes in contact with. The worst part, is I have a teeny tiny little baby latched on and chugging away.

The advice echoes through my head:

“Never wake a sleeping baby.”

“Let him eat when he is hungry.”

“Make sure to let him tell you when he’s full.”

But what if his sister is covered in POO…

What would you do in this situation? What would you do if it happened TWICE in one day?! (True story!).

This IS real life people!

XO- Erica

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